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YOUR LOVER

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How she lured you into her trap,
How you stretched your hand and held
hers,
-that woman called Death-
And fled into her Realm;
I do not understand
I do not wish to comprehend.

© Daisy Moraa

courtesy of Storyzetu

0 Responses

  1. tonny muchui says:

    waaaaaaaaay too short.

    1. Daisy Moraa says:

      It’s the shortest poem I’ve ever written.I love it just the way it is since its words are the only ones that could describe exactly what I felt after losing a very important person in my life.
      I’ve thought of lengthening it but sentiments won’t allow me and I might distort these precious lines.
      Thank you for your response Tony.

    2. Ngartia says:

      I think that is. what makes it a gem.

  2. Ngartia says:

    short and precise, I like it.

  3. tonny muchui says:

    On the emotional aspect I agree that’s what befitted it but it made me want more I kept on rereading it to see if there was something I had missed.guess I have what I can call readers greed.

    1. Ngartia says:

      I admit I also read it several times. I think the poet would have thrown us off had she continued.

      1. Daisy Moraa says:

        Ngartia continuing the poem will tie it down to my experience and limit the reader’s ability to relate to it.

        The way it is,one can ask many questions.For instance:why did I refer to death as a woman?is it because it was a male who died?and if so,was it a husband,a fiancè,a boyfriend,a father,a grandfather,a brother?How close were we?
        And the fact that I do not understand their death,exposes me and the reader to the reality of Death itself and its role in the human race.
        I depict death as a snatcher of what I may have thought belongs to me,but do we[the human race] really have power over the Death?

    2. Daisy Moraa says:

      Tony I read a quote somewhere,can’t remember by who or exactly what its words were,which said a good poem should draw its reader in and should have just the exact words to convey the intended message but it should leave room for speculation.The speculation allows the reader to relate to the poem in their own way and ask questions that may never be answered.I think that’s what ‘YOUR LOVER’ does to its readers,you included.

      The intended message is the inability of the poet to understand the death of the loved one.I left out the details of who it was,when,how and the reaction I had [I couldn’t understand Death.not many can.] hence you are left with the speculation of what really happened.I suppose that’s what you’ve called ‘reader’s greed’.

      I love your reaction.

      1. Ngartia says:

        one question ; ever taught literature?

  4. Daisy Moraa says:

    Ngartia ‘have I taught literature?’ No,I haven’t.

    1. joash says:

      a daisy write ,,,catchy. i like it.

      1. Daisy Moraa says:

        @joash thank you 🙂

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